Where there is a Will, There is a way... to Cheat
A very pvp active ret paladin in KF (also a friend of mine) is often running his mouth about how terrible my pvp gear is and how he could easily beat me in a duel. First, my pvp gear is terrible and I am equally bad at the high end nuances of player on player fights, wheather in duel or arena/bg situations. But, being the person I am, some months ago I challenged him to a fight. A duel to end all duels, if you will. Winner takes all (some large amount of gold). Him in full S3 gear vs me in 1 piece S2 and 2 pieces S1 with the rest being a hodge-podge of pve gear. Oh, and did I mention I will be in my pve shadow spec (no silence)?
-------------------http://elitistjerks.com/attachment.p...1&d=1206689965 -------------------
------------------------------Goliath and David..... David sporting some smashing yellow, purple, and Beige armor. Very Hip.
My original plan for defeating the ret paladin in this real life David vs Goliath was to use uncommon craftables and consumables to throw him off from what he is used to seeing (mana burn, mass dispel, shield, work him down with dots, etc). Do something unexpected and I might squeak out a miracle win. Arcanite Bomb seemed promising but with a long casting time it would probably result in him with 1k less mana, but me with 6k less life. Not a good trade. Sticky glue could have worked, but with BoF it was questionable if it would keep him locked down (and I didn't exactly have a lot of them to practice with). I couldn't think of anything to get the drop on my Ret Paladin foe and instead started to wage a mental war. Bringing up the fight about once a week or hinting at my constant training for the encounter (there was none).
[Guild][Tagdoodle]: Oh man, I almost have the thing crafted, might schedule an MC run later to grab some cores
[Guild][Tagdoodle]: Just fine tuning my kite and jump route, its pretty tricky!
[Guild][Tagdoodle]: This day the Lord will deliver you into my hand, and I will strike you down, and cut off your head; and I will give the dead bodies of the host of the Philistines this day to the birds of the air and to the wild beasts of the earth
Not the worlds best smack talk, but you get the point (PS quoting scriptures always scares opponents). The tactic started to take its toll as the Ret paladin began doubting that he was, in fact, so sure a winner in the impending duel. He began talking boldly about his famed dps and claiming he could kill me before his bubble wore off. This was my chance. The new bet quickly arose: Can I survive 12 seconds of full ret paladin onslaught, not being allowed to cast heals or wear gear different from what I would normally duel him in. My opportunity arose. I casually offered the wager, and my opponent agreed. The trap was set.
To be sure, he was Goliath. He is a prolific pvper that hangs with "the in crowd" of our servers Arena crowd. He sports over 2000+ ratings for all 3 team sizes and sells points regularly swelling his bank roll to considerable size. He has been known to crit so hard with Crusader Strike that his opponent will be rendered unable to walk and permanently impotent. Hefting over 2000 AP and 32% crit, I was certain to die and there was a very real chance I would never get a boner again.
Immune Immune Immune
Just as David had a small strap of leather and a handful of stones, I too was equip with my magic weapon. Given to me by Arch Angel Kyb, I strolled into battle with one chance at slaying the beast, and becoming the unlikely winner of this match. Bets were placed (10:1 odds against me, ouch) and specifics were decided on. If after 12 seconds I am alive, I win. If I am dead, he wins. I chose the location of the duel and made a big fuss about being next to a tree, keeping the mind games going till the very end. Heres how the battle went down:
Tagdoodle Casts Flask of Petrification
Bovyce Melee [Tagdoodle] Immune
Bovyce Melee [Tagdoodle] Immune
Bovyce Casts Crusader Strike [Tagdoodle] Immune
Bovyce Melee [Tagdoodle] Immune
Hubris... is a Bitch.
-------------------http://elitistjerks.com/attachment.p...1&d=1206689965 -------------------
------------------------------Goliath and David..... David sporting some smashing yellow, purple, and Beige armor. Very Hip.
My original plan for defeating the ret paladin in this real life David vs Goliath was to use uncommon craftables and consumables to throw him off from what he is used to seeing (mana burn, mass dispel, shield, work him down with dots, etc). Do something unexpected and I might squeak out a miracle win. Arcanite Bomb seemed promising but with a long casting time it would probably result in him with 1k less mana, but me with 6k less life. Not a good trade. Sticky glue could have worked, but with BoF it was questionable if it would keep him locked down (and I didn't exactly have a lot of them to practice with). I couldn't think of anything to get the drop on my Ret Paladin foe and instead started to wage a mental war. Bringing up the fight about once a week or hinting at my constant training for the encounter (there was none).
[Guild][Tagdoodle]: Oh man, I almost have the thing crafted, might schedule an MC run later to grab some cores
[Guild][Tagdoodle]: Just fine tuning my kite and jump route, its pretty tricky!
[Guild][Tagdoodle]: This day the Lord will deliver you into my hand, and I will strike you down, and cut off your head; and I will give the dead bodies of the host of the Philistines this day to the birds of the air and to the wild beasts of the earth
Not the worlds best smack talk, but you get the point (PS quoting scriptures always scares opponents). The tactic started to take its toll as the Ret paladin began doubting that he was, in fact, so sure a winner in the impending duel. He began talking boldly about his famed dps and claiming he could kill me before his bubble wore off. This was my chance. The new bet quickly arose: Can I survive 12 seconds of full ret paladin onslaught, not being allowed to cast heals or wear gear different from what I would normally duel him in. My opportunity arose. I casually offered the wager, and my opponent agreed. The trap was set.
To be sure, he was Goliath. He is a prolific pvper that hangs with "the in crowd" of our servers Arena crowd. He sports over 2000+ ratings for all 3 team sizes and sells points regularly swelling his bank roll to considerable size. He has been known to crit so hard with Crusader Strike that his opponent will be rendered unable to walk and permanently impotent. Hefting over 2000 AP and 32% crit, I was certain to die and there was a very real chance I would never get a boner again.
Immune Immune Immune
Just as David had a small strap of leather and a handful of stones, I too was equip with my magic weapon. Given to me by Arch Angel Kyb, I strolled into battle with one chance at slaying the beast, and becoming the unlikely winner of this match. Bets were placed (10:1 odds against me, ouch) and specifics were decided on. If after 12 seconds I am alive, I win. If I am dead, he wins. I chose the location of the duel and made a big fuss about being next to a tree, keeping the mind games going till the very end. Heres how the battle went down:
Tagdoodle Casts Flask of Petrification
Bovyce Melee [Tagdoodle] Immune
Bovyce Melee [Tagdoodle] Immune
Bovyce Casts Crusader Strike [Tagdoodle] Immune
Bovyce Melee [Tagdoodle] Immune
Hubris... is a Bitch.
Total Comments 8
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A+, would read again.
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Very hip.
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Where do I subscribe to more of your thoughts ?
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Needs more closure. Did he pay up or not?
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Or, does it even matter? A Flask of Petrification was used. That should be enough for any man, woman or child.
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Pure genius.
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Nicley done
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hahah genius
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