my wife watches over my shoulder sometimes while I play, and it seems like there are 2 mods that she focuses on to figure out whats going on. DBM is deftinately the key to enabling her wow-backseat-driving; she'll tell me "HES GOING TO PUMMEL!" on VR, and "ANOTHER ROCK THING IS GOING TO DROP!!" on prince. She'll also say, "TELL THOSE GUYS TO HURRY UP TO STABLES!!!". its quite fun.
The other thing that helps her out a it is the way that I use pitbull; in raids, I have my MA list in a vertical group, and my main tank in a horizontal group, with their targets below them; then i turn on interaction lines, and it draws an easy to read graph of who's healing who and who's damaging what. She can quickly see, "Gruul switched targets to that other guy, but the healers were still healing the first guy.. thats why the first two tanky thingees died so quick".